Social Skills Part 2.

3. Think before thou speak.

It's funny how you catch others uttering their ideas or opinions either irrelevant or senseless towards the topic being discussed.

But it's even worse to have the opposite party bringing up sensitive issues or phrase their words in an offensive manner.

Jeremy :"I think that the Government really needs a change. It's too corrupted and old fashioned."

Francis: "Forget it, please use some brain of yours. No matter what you do, it's not going to change the Government."

Before Jeremy could elaborate on his ideas or suggestions on what could be done to support his topic, he was ridiculed and insulted. I've met several few who are really good at such words, good at offending and putting down the other person's opinion or idea. Be it a conscious or subconscious effect, that person emits negative energy, so why bother talking to the person if you're not looking forward to be ridiculed and mocked?

4. Gossip.

I did wrote a long post about this quite a long time ago. So if you want a full write up on it, just refer to my old post.

http://darylization.blogspot.com/2007/11/gossip-can-break-strongest-bond.html

To make it brief, when you catch someone gossiping about others, what makes you think that person doesn't gossip about you?

Would you seek that person for personal council or help in your troubles?

5. Observation.

Please please please. Learn to observe body language/gestures.

If it's obvious that the other party shows lack of dislike in the topic being discussed, by all means change the topic accordingly. Insisting on the topic without an interesting approach would only kill the person's mood in socializing with you.

In fact, there are 4 types of people.

a. Dominator : A person who likes to dominate the other person by strong approaches such as increasing the volume of his/her speech, aggressive phrases or words or very imposing body language.

b. Promoter : "It's all about me". This type of person loves to get all the attention possible by promoting, mainly about him/herself. Many empty facts, talks or rumours so that he/her to obtain the spotlight. Very high self-esteem.

c. Supporter : This person agrees with you almost everything you say. Nodding his/her head most of the time and always giving you a pat on your back telling you that you have his/her support. Doesn't go against your thoughts or ideas and accept them without proper consideration. Can be seen to have more low self-esteem.

d. Analyzer : Analyzes the topic being discussed with proper facts and credible statements. Listening more than speaking. Has the tendency to rub their chin to decipher opinions and thoughts being thrown during discussion.

Do not get it wrong though, a person may have a hybrid of 2 or more personalities as shown above. So go figure out which personalities you have and whether it's helping you socialize with others well.

- End of part 2 -