Tuesday, March 17, 2009
An interesting way of understanding today's crisis
Don't get me wrong, not trying to paint a gloomy picture to spoils everyone's mood lol. But I believe that everyone ought to know how it all happened and not be ignorant about it.
Friday, January 9, 2009
Social Skills Part 2.
3. Think before thou speak.
It's funny how you catch others uttering their ideas or opinions either irrelevant or senseless towards the topic being discussed.
But it's even worse to have the opposite party bringing up sensitive issues or phrase their words in an offensive manner.
Jeremy :"I think that the Government really needs a change. It's too corrupted and old fashioned."
Francis: "Forget it, please use some brain of yours. No matter what you do, it's not going to change the Government."
Before Jeremy could elaborate on his ideas or suggestions on what could be done to support his topic, he was ridiculed and insulted. I've met several few who are really good at such words, good at offending and putting down the other person's opinion or idea. Be it a conscious or subconscious effect, that person emits negative energy, so why bother talking to the person if you're not looking forward to be ridiculed and mocked?
4. Gossip.
I did wrote a long post about this quite a long time ago. So if you want a full write up on it, just refer to my old post.
http://darylization.blogspot.com/2007/11/gossip-can-break-strongest-bond.html
To make it brief, when you catch someone gossiping about others, what makes you think that person doesn't gossip about you?
Would you seek that person for personal council or help in your troubles?
5. Observation.
Please please please. Learn to observe body language/gestures.
If it's obvious that the other party shows lack of dislike in the topic being discussed, by all means change the topic accordingly. Insisting on the topic without an interesting approach would only kill the person's mood in socializing with you.
In fact, there are 4 types of people.
a. Dominator : A person who likes to dominate the other person by strong approaches such as increasing the volume of his/her speech, aggressive phrases or words or very imposing body language.
b. Promoter : "It's all about me". This type of person loves to get all the attention possible by promoting, mainly about him/herself. Many empty facts, talks or rumours so that he/her to obtain the spotlight. Very high self-esteem.
c. Supporter : This person agrees with you almost everything you say. Nodding his/her head most of the time and always giving you a pat on your back telling you that you have his/her support. Doesn't go against your thoughts or ideas and accept them without proper consideration. Can be seen to have more low self-esteem.
d. Analyzer : Analyzes the topic being discussed with proper facts and credible statements. Listening more than speaking. Has the tendency to rub their chin to decipher opinions and thoughts being thrown during discussion.
Do not get it wrong though, a person may have a hybrid of 2 or more personalities as shown above. So go figure out which personalities you have and whether it's helping you socialize with others well.
- End of part 2 -
It's funny how you catch others uttering their ideas or opinions either irrelevant or senseless towards the topic being discussed.
But it's even worse to have the opposite party bringing up sensitive issues or phrase their words in an offensive manner.
Jeremy :"I think that the Government really needs a change. It's too corrupted and old fashioned."
Francis: "Forget it, please use some brain of yours. No matter what you do, it's not going to change the Government."
Before Jeremy could elaborate on his ideas or suggestions on what could be done to support his topic, he was ridiculed and insulted. I've met several few who are really good at such words, good at offending and putting down the other person's opinion or idea. Be it a conscious or subconscious effect, that person emits negative energy, so why bother talking to the person if you're not looking forward to be ridiculed and mocked?
4. Gossip.
I did wrote a long post about this quite a long time ago. So if you want a full write up on it, just refer to my old post.
http://darylization.blogspot.com/2007/11/gossip-can-break-strongest-bond.html
To make it brief, when you catch someone gossiping about others, what makes you think that person doesn't gossip about you?
Would you seek that person for personal council or help in your troubles?
5. Observation.
Please please please. Learn to observe body language/gestures.
If it's obvious that the other party shows lack of dislike in the topic being discussed, by all means change the topic accordingly. Insisting on the topic without an interesting approach would only kill the person's mood in socializing with you.
In fact, there are 4 types of people.
a. Dominator : A person who likes to dominate the other person by strong approaches such as increasing the volume of his/her speech, aggressive phrases or words or very imposing body language.
b. Promoter : "It's all about me". This type of person loves to get all the attention possible by promoting, mainly about him/herself. Many empty facts, talks or rumours so that he/her to obtain the spotlight. Very high self-esteem.
c. Supporter : This person agrees with you almost everything you say. Nodding his/her head most of the time and always giving you a pat on your back telling you that you have his/her support. Doesn't go against your thoughts or ideas and accept them without proper consideration. Can be seen to have more low self-esteem.
d. Analyzer : Analyzes the topic being discussed with proper facts and credible statements. Listening more than speaking. Has the tendency to rub their chin to decipher opinions and thoughts being thrown during discussion.
Do not get it wrong though, a person may have a hybrid of 2 or more personalities as shown above. So go figure out which personalities you have and whether it's helping you socialize with others well.
- End of part 2 -
Monday, December 22, 2008
Social Skills Part 1
From what i comprehend of this essential skill in life, it amuses me and my brother at moments when individuals are not aware of what it really means to sharpen your social skills.
Do you measure by the number of contacts in your circle?
The amount of time spent with different groups of people?
Or, perhaps, being occupied with activities all the time?
I would like to draw your attention to a more narrow perspective. To a simple conversation. In my objective of having good social skills in a conversation is simple :
- Able to listen, decipher, consider and then respond accordingly.
- Able to share your fair share of experiences and point of view with proper consideration of the other party's feelings.
- To establish good contact or improved relationship with the person by the end of the day.
However, over and over again, it never cease to occur that all these simple objectives will be swept away with individuals suffering from several social sickness symptoms.
1. SAS (Short Attention Span) : Unable to focus and establish proper dialogues with an individual or a group of individuals in an appropriate manner.
Allow me to illustrate.
John : Hey, Allen! Would like to ask about yesterday's assignment.
Allen : Yeah, sure, go ahead.
John : Alright. About page 48, you know where it requires to express our . .
(Maria cuts in abruptly)
Maria : Allen! How are you!? I heard that you were going to participate in the event this friday!
Allen : Oh you heard? Yeah, I'll be there, it's going to be really fun ... (continues)
Just imagine how would John feel ? o.o' Just a moment ago, he was trying to establish a proper dialogue with Allen but Maria just had to interrupt the contact and prioritize her social need. Allen on the serious note, is suffering from SAS. He obviously knew that John was talking to him earlier but he couldn't ask Maria to give him a moment to reply to John.
2. "I Shall Speak Whenever I Like."
This disease comes in various ways; the concept is the same at the end of the day. They just can't help it, they need to be heard, they need to speak, more importantly, they can't just listen. It's different when you hear, and when you Actually Listen. Listening requires more mental energy, focus and attention. You can't decipher information by just hearing them, you need to listen and grasp what the other person is actually SAYING.
Sounds easier than it looks huh?
The problem usually lies with the fact that the individual isn't interested to listen to begin with. He/She just want to be heard. Not hidden away from the "noise". They either speak LOUDER, insist on the same point in different ways or exactly the same sentence, end up talking to themselves or share their "wise" point of view at every possible opportunity. Thing is, that's not going to make you look sociable, it only makes it look the exact opposite.
I like this quote from Bleach (anime), where Aizen Sousuke said this,
"It's different when you admire someone than actually understanding that someone."
Something like that .. But anyhow, the point is, if you're looking for some to admire you and think, " He/She's the bomb!" That isn't actually socializing, that's just a temporary hype and amazement which people would just move on knowing that you're actually no one unique or extraordinary. People are actually seeking to understand and to be understood. It's a mutual understanding.
- End of Part 1 -
Do you measure by the number of contacts in your circle?
The amount of time spent with different groups of people?
Or, perhaps, being occupied with activities all the time?
I would like to draw your attention to a more narrow perspective. To a simple conversation. In my objective of having good social skills in a conversation is simple :
- Able to listen, decipher, consider and then respond accordingly.
- Able to share your fair share of experiences and point of view with proper consideration of the other party's feelings.
- To establish good contact or improved relationship with the person by the end of the day.
However, over and over again, it never cease to occur that all these simple objectives will be swept away with individuals suffering from several social sickness symptoms.
1. SAS (Short Attention Span) : Unable to focus and establish proper dialogues with an individual or a group of individuals in an appropriate manner.
Allow me to illustrate.
John : Hey, Allen! Would like to ask about yesterday's assignment.
Allen : Yeah, sure, go ahead.
John : Alright. About page 48, you know where it requires to express our . .
(Maria cuts in abruptly)
Maria : Allen! How are you!? I heard that you were going to participate in the event this friday!
Allen : Oh you heard? Yeah, I'll be there, it's going to be really fun ... (continues)
Just imagine how would John feel ? o.o' Just a moment ago, he was trying to establish a proper dialogue with Allen but Maria just had to interrupt the contact and prioritize her social need. Allen on the serious note, is suffering from SAS. He obviously knew that John was talking to him earlier but he couldn't ask Maria to give him a moment to reply to John.
2. "I Shall Speak Whenever I Like."
This disease comes in various ways; the concept is the same at the end of the day. They just can't help it, they need to be heard, they need to speak, more importantly, they can't just listen. It's different when you hear, and when you Actually Listen. Listening requires more mental energy, focus and attention. You can't decipher information by just hearing them, you need to listen and grasp what the other person is actually SAYING.
Sounds easier than it looks huh?
The problem usually lies with the fact that the individual isn't interested to listen to begin with. He/She just want to be heard. Not hidden away from the "noise". They either speak LOUDER, insist on the same point in different ways or exactly the same sentence, end up talking to themselves or share their "wise" point of view at every possible opportunity. Thing is, that's not going to make you look sociable, it only makes it look the exact opposite.
I like this quote from Bleach (anime), where Aizen Sousuke said this,
"It's different when you admire someone than actually understanding that someone."
Something like that .. But anyhow, the point is, if you're looking for some to admire you and think, " He/She's the bomb!" That isn't actually socializing, that's just a temporary hype and amazement which people would just move on knowing that you're actually no one unique or extraordinary. People are actually seeking to understand and to be understood. It's a mutual understanding.
- End of Part 1 -
Monday, December 8, 2008
Education and Ethics.
Working in Berjaya Times Square isn't the ideal place for a conducive environment in terms of providing service based jobs.
Perhaps, not for me.
For PJ peeps, it's a close up and personal observation of the other "side" of Malaysians.
Where the community spits, utter vulgar language and draws out their cigarette bud wherever they like. Of course, over the years, the numbers of "them" has decreased but still, it's a plain ugly sight when they exhibit their immoral codes and values.
Is it just education or ethics? Or both?
The simplest things in everyday life, giving way when someone wishes to cut to the other lane when you're driving, queuing up for your turn when you're trying to buy a ticket, pressing the open button at the lift when someone is trying to enter before the lift door closes ..
There was a survey conducted here in Malaysia by foreigners, listing us as the world's top 5 rudest countries. Sure, there may be some flaws and loopholes in the survey but still, it shows Malaysia's moral codes and conducts. And for crying out loud, we're not a 3rd world country, we're a developing country. There's a huge difference in classifying ourselves and thinking that "It's okay lah." and continue doing what you've been doing.
The LRT system alone is so complicated, a 3rd world nation can't afford to hire foreign engineers and architects to construct something like that. Don't mention the Petronas Twin towers or Maxis for instance, these sort of industries wouldn't exist if have hardcore poverty on a LARGE scale.
The community has their fair share of responsibility to educate and install proper values and ethics into the minds of their children. However, from a bigger picture, it's the government that governs the people of the country. And the government needs a change.
So please, manipulate your education and VALUES, if you have any (I pray that you do), and make a change.
Thanks for your time.
God bless.
Perhaps, not for me.
For PJ peeps, it's a close up and personal observation of the other "side" of Malaysians.
Where the community spits, utter vulgar language and draws out their cigarette bud wherever they like. Of course, over the years, the numbers of "them" has decreased but still, it's a plain ugly sight when they exhibit their immoral codes and values.
Is it just education or ethics? Or both?
The simplest things in everyday life, giving way when someone wishes to cut to the other lane when you're driving, queuing up for your turn when you're trying to buy a ticket, pressing the open button at the lift when someone is trying to enter before the lift door closes ..
There was a survey conducted here in Malaysia by foreigners, listing us as the world's top 5 rudest countries. Sure, there may be some flaws and loopholes in the survey but still, it shows Malaysia's moral codes and conducts. And for crying out loud, we're not a 3rd world country, we're a developing country. There's a huge difference in classifying ourselves and thinking that "It's okay lah." and continue doing what you've been doing.
The LRT system alone is so complicated, a 3rd world nation can't afford to hire foreign engineers and architects to construct something like that. Don't mention the Petronas Twin towers or Maxis for instance, these sort of industries wouldn't exist if have hardcore poverty on a LARGE scale.
The community has their fair share of responsibility to educate and install proper values and ethics into the minds of their children. However, from a bigger picture, it's the government that governs the people of the country. And the government needs a change.
So please, manipulate your education and VALUES, if you have any (I pray that you do), and make a change.
Thanks for your time.
God bless.
Saturday, November 29, 2008
Parents.
In 20 years of my life, I've never seen so much pain in someone before.
I really thanked my brother for being there for me and cared for me with all his heart. What i'm doing right now, hardly match up for the things he's done for me, but I would still proceed with it.
There are many type of parents in this globe that we live in.
Not too long ago, I read an article from The Star, mentioning that parents do not have a course or a guide to qualify them as parents. Gary mentioned that there should be institution to guide parents on how to be a good parent. Probably we should be one too.
In life, before we actually want to guide someone, mentor, teach or be a role model to wrap it all, we must question ourselves, how much do our life values, belief and principles weigh against the world? Or in fact, do we have any of those?
Do we have a personal deep philosophy of life that we hold strongly to and would want others to look at life the same way you do?
If we can hardly take good care of ourselves, to know that we're matured enough, emotionally stable enough, how can we even guide or influence others?
It's true that life is a never ending, learning journey. But there is a point in life where you come to a stable sense of reasoning, of having your personal values and belief and would want to live life to it's fullest.
There is a difference in being a parent and a guardian. A parent would pour love on to their child, guide them to understand life and understand them in every possible way. To be there for them when they're hurt and to protect them from danger. To get to know their potential life partner, to see whether he/she suits your child (considering the fact that if you really know your child well) and then show support in all ways possible.
Sometimes, it amazes me that certain individuals can be so numb and hard headed that they just don't know why are they even living life for.
I just need prayers for them right now.
God bless.
I really thanked my brother for being there for me and cared for me with all his heart. What i'm doing right now, hardly match up for the things he's done for me, but I would still proceed with it.
There are many type of parents in this globe that we live in.
Not too long ago, I read an article from The Star, mentioning that parents do not have a course or a guide to qualify them as parents. Gary mentioned that there should be institution to guide parents on how to be a good parent. Probably we should be one too.
In life, before we actually want to guide someone, mentor, teach or be a role model to wrap it all, we must question ourselves, how much do our life values, belief and principles weigh against the world? Or in fact, do we have any of those?
Do we have a personal deep philosophy of life that we hold strongly to and would want others to look at life the same way you do?
If we can hardly take good care of ourselves, to know that we're matured enough, emotionally stable enough, how can we even guide or influence others?
It's true that life is a never ending, learning journey. But there is a point in life where you come to a stable sense of reasoning, of having your personal values and belief and would want to live life to it's fullest.
There is a difference in being a parent and a guardian. A parent would pour love on to their child, guide them to understand life and understand them in every possible way. To be there for them when they're hurt and to protect them from danger. To get to know their potential life partner, to see whether he/she suits your child (considering the fact that if you really know your child well) and then show support in all ways possible.
Sometimes, it amazes me that certain individuals can be so numb and hard headed that they just don't know why are they even living life for.
I just need prayers for them right now.
God bless.
Wednesday, November 19, 2008
Wong Fu Publicity.
Just love their videos. Really inspiring and mind provoking. Please do take a look at their other videos too :)
http://www.youtube.com/user/WongFuProductions?ob=1
They have traveled far and they'll keep going on. Please do check out their really old ones too, you'll feel the major difference.
Thanks for your time.
Cheers, God bless.
http://www.youtube.com/user/WongFuProductions?ob=1
They have traveled far and they'll keep going on. Please do check out their really old ones too, you'll feel the major difference.
Thanks for your time.
Cheers, God bless.
Tuesday, November 11, 2008
Does James Bond with you?
It's been a while back since I watched it. I'll give it a 7/10.
DON'T WORRY, i won't reveal anything here. Since the last time I spent so much time writing a movie review, my traffic decreased instead of increasing. Will consider that a "life lesson" learned.
Tribute time!
Sean Connery (1962-1971)
Dr. No 1962, From Russia with Love 1963, Goldfinger 1964, Thunderball 1965, You Only Live Twice 1967, Diamonds Are Forever 1971.
My mum really loves him, lol.
George Lazenby (1969)
On Her Majesty's Secret Service 1969
Roger Moore (1973-1985)
Live and Let Die 1973, The Man with the Golden Gun 1974, The Spy Who Loved Me 1977, Moonraker 1979, For Your Eyes Only 1981, Octopussy 1983, A View to Kill 1985.
Timothy Dalton (1987-1989)
The Living Daylights 1987, Licence to Kill 1989
Pierce Brosnan (1995-2002) Finally! Mamma mia!
lol. Just can't help it.
GoldenEye 1995, Tomorrow Never Dies 1997, The World Is Not Enough 1999, Die Another Day 2002
Daniel Craig (2006-Present)
Casino Royale 2006, Quantum of Solace 2008.
Frankly speaking, I really enjoy Craig's bond, although I've never seen the earlier ones before. Yet if compared to Pierce's, Craig's bond appeals to me more.
More realistic, vulnerable and logical in many ways.
However, for Quantum, it's rather short for a bond movie. The final showdown was quite a letdown as alot of anticipation was built.
Oh and just for your information, the total amount of budget for all the bond movies is $1,098,000,000.
But in return of all that investment, is $11,615,711,960.
Would really want to watch the old ones now, it'll be fascinating.
Thanks for your time.
God bless, cheers.
DON'T WORRY, i won't reveal anything here. Since the last time I spent so much time writing a movie review, my traffic decreased instead of increasing. Will consider that a "life lesson" learned.
Tribute time!
Sean Connery (1962-1971)
Dr. No 1962, From Russia with Love 1963, Goldfinger 1964, Thunderball 1965, You Only Live Twice 1967, Diamonds Are Forever 1971.My mum really loves him, lol.
George Lazenby (1969)
On Her Majesty's Secret Service 1969
Roger Moore (1973-1985)
Live and Let Die 1973, The Man with the Golden Gun 1974, The Spy Who Loved Me 1977, Moonraker 1979, For Your Eyes Only 1981, Octopussy 1983, A View to Kill 1985.Timothy Dalton (1987-1989)
The Living Daylights 1987, Licence to Kill 1989Pierce Brosnan (1995-2002) Finally! Mamma mia!
lol. Just can't help it.
GoldenEye 1995, Tomorrow Never Dies 1997, The World Is Not Enough 1999, Die Another Day 2002
Daniel Craig (2006-Present)
Casino Royale 2006, Quantum of Solace 2008.
Frankly speaking, I really enjoy Craig's bond, although I've never seen the earlier ones before. Yet if compared to Pierce's, Craig's bond appeals to me more.
More realistic, vulnerable and logical in many ways.
However, for Quantum, it's rather short for a bond movie. The final showdown was quite a letdown as alot of anticipation was built.
Oh and just for your information, the total amount of budget for all the bond movies is $1,098,000,000.
But in return of all that investment, is $11,615,711,960.
Would really want to watch the old ones now, it'll be fascinating.
Thanks for your time.
God bless, cheers.
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